Perspective

Reflections on “Lament” by Tim Be Told

I think this song is about perspective –more specifically our perspective of God’s character. Eighty percent of the song he talks about how God’s overwhelmingly jealous, not enough kind and ultimately breaks us. I can identify with that. I don’t know what God ‘steals’ from us. Everything we have is a blessing from Him. However my self-righteousness peeks its head in claiming God is taking happiness from me. He steals my joy when things don’t go my way or play out how I plan. I like that the lyricists blames God for the ‘mess’ in life. I do that. I identify problems or difficulties then complain they are too much or God is outside of that arena of life. There I am, left alone to battle through it or fix it.

Verse two- Sometimes I feel the punishment of my sin more than God’s forgiveness. Often times that knockout is self-imposed, other times I feel like god allowing me to wallow in my sin is punishment in itself. (Romans 1:24-25)

When I view myself in the right perspective, then I want God to ‘punch me out’ take everything that I have made and build up what He wants. Too often I become possessive of things, ideas, feelings that are not what God wants to construct in my life. So needs to come in ‘like a wrecking ball…’

Chorus-
Yes. I know you are great but is a bad god better than none? How much more will it take to undo the damage that you have done? Cause the wicked and wayward continue to thrive. And the martyrs continue giving their lives. Oh the faithful never survive.

This is what plays on repeat in my head. I know this isn’t the intent of the song (because there is redemption in the final twenty percent). Tim be told isn’t proclaiming this as truth rather a sincere plea of desperation. The first line is heartbreaking. I think of my friends without God and wonder, “How do you do it? How are you still alive?” –I would have certainly killed myself without the hope a relationship with God has given me. Again, it is perspective.
How can he say God is bad? I sludge through the truth that God is too good. Too pure. Too holy. He is a God that is so much of what I am not that I cannot connect with him. Yet he allows me to. He has torn that veil that blinds me in lies.

I used to blame God for the ‘damage’ in my life but it was man’s introduction of sin that has caused the world (and my life) to be impaired. Then again, God is there to free us from all that damages us! And if wicked people thrive, it doesn’t matter. And if martyrs loose their lives, it is for the glory of God. I hope to be faithful and I hope I don’t merely ‘survive’ the world. I want to transform the world (even if it is just a minuscule ripple).

Verse three- Do Christians live in ‘hopeless delusion’? It is perspective. Unbelievers without the freedom of the Gospel can certainly make that argument against all faiths. His confession of being unsure of how much more he can take scares me. It is healthy for people of faith to be stretched and tested. But it is difficult. Sometimes, in the midst of testing, I see myself tinkering on the edge of surrender.

Bridge- Final plea or transition? He is correcting the false perceptions we all find ourselves lost in. He asks for forgiveness and begs that God continue to hear him. And God always does. He wants to hear our cries, doubts, and misconceptions of His character. He wants to hear and correct our false perspective.

Revises Chorus-

Yes, I know You are great That You're a good God, and You are love.
 How much more will it take to undo the damage that I have done?
Please conquer these demons and the darkness inside.

Shine Your light on this cold heart of mine. Maybe my faith will survive

Perspective. I pollute the perfection God desires in my own life and throughout the world. He is tirelessly correcting my missteps.
I identify with the plea in this last chorus. And I truest that because of Him, I will persevere.